Ghosts From The Past
by jedi-lelila
Summary: The story begins on Endor, right after the end of ROTJ. Han and Leia, while trying to start their future together, are confronted to ghosts from their pasts. HL, AU story
1. The war is over

**GHOSTS FROM THE PAST**

**Disclaimer**: I don't own any of the Star Wars Universe. It all belongs to George Lucas. I wrote this story for fun only and I'm not trying to make any money out of it. 

**Category: **Post-Rotj, totally AU 

**Summary: **The story begins on Endor, right after the end of ROTJ. Han and Leia, while trying to start their future together, are confronted to ghosts from their pasts. 

**Characters**: They are GL's but OCs are mine.

**Note: **This is my very first try at FanFiction. I started it in 2003, and I haven't finished it yet. I'm working on it again. Some of you may have already read it on JCF, but please feel free to review again. I love reviews, hehe…

BTW, English isn't my native language. So, please be nice with me ;-) 

**Chapter 1:**** The war is over…**

Over. 

This war was finally over. Well, almost. There were still some Imperial strongholds left.  
Han Solo could hardly believe it. He stood, alone, in the Ewok camp, on Endor looking at the sky where had once been the worst weapon ever built. After all, it had been a weapon that had come directly from a _human and evil_ mind… 

The war was over, the Emperor was dead, as was Vader. Right, the Rebellion had suffered a lot during this ultimate battle against the Empire. The New Order, completely on Palpatine's view, was the exact reflect of his senility, his evil mind, and his madness. 

Han wished his mind could stop wandering. Of course, there had been losses. But ALL wars meant losses. And Imperial losses have been huger than the Alliance ones. The fighters, the _Executor_, the Death Star,… _Clones_,Han thought bitterly. Lots of them had been common clones, without names, just a number… For their officers, what for were they useful? Being killed? Obeying blindly to orders? For the officers and the Empire, they were considered as common things and certainly not as human beings. 

Solo felt nauseous at this thought. 

_This is one of the reasons I left the Navy_, he remembered. _Well, I did not exactly leave,_ he amended, _rather kicked out_. Of course, when he had left, the existence of the clones had still been a rumour, but nevertheless… Knowing the Imperial mentality, it wouldn't have lasted long (if it had been real) before human officers acted towards the clones as they used to acting towards women or non-human species. A day, he had heard an alien saying that he was totally supporting the Rebellion, because – according to Imperials - non-humans were nothing, because "even animals were treated better than aliens".  
As a Corellian, Han had always been against slavery. Clones with numbers didn't have any identity or humanity, so they were nobody as well as slaves. That's why Han had saved Chewie, because he hadn't been able to bear it anymore, even if it had brought him troubles. Sort of. Han grinned at the memory. 

_At first, Chewie had been following Han even if the latter had tried desperately to get rid of this unbearable Wookiee. Han did speak little of Shyriiwook but he had been able to understand quite some things about the Wookiee. His name, well he hadn't been wholly sure but it was something like Chewbacca, yeah that was it, Chewbacca. From Kashyyyk naturally. Anyway, maybe it hadn't been such a good idea to know his name, or to call him by his name. Consequently, the Wookiee had seemed to be stuck to Han. Whatever the Corellian had said or done to make Chewbacca leave, hadn't worked. At least, the Wookiee had been a few steps behind, but he had been_ still _there. He had explained something about a Wookiee custom, the Life Debt, to protect Han because he had saved his life or some stuff like this…_ Bullshit, _Han had thought at the moment. But even when he had tried hard he hadn't succeeded in making Chewie leave. At the end, they had understood each other so well that they had become associates then friends, very close friends_. And now, on Endor, Han regretted nothing of this. 

His mind came back to the war they had just won. 

They had just won. _They,_ it sounded right now, for Han had committed to the Rebellion. He was part of this group _officially,_ after he had been with them for nearly four years. 

In spite of those losses, many Rebels were alive. _As were Imperials_, Han thought with bitterness. He made a big effort to stop thinking with such pessimism. After all, he was alive, as were Chewie, Luke, Leia… 

Leia… 

Han thought back to the mission. _Hidden in a nook, near the back door of the bunker, he had been trying to open this damn door, thanks to a court-circuit, when…_ Han shut his eyes as he relived the terrific moment again. _When Leia had cried out in pain_. How close he had been to lose her forever! It had been right then, that it had hit him. He loved her. Really loved her, more than anything he had, more than his own miserable life. How much he loved her! 

He was in love with a Princess, from head to toe in love with her, madly in love with her.  
_Her_. Princess Leia. The Princess Leia Organa of Alderaan, senator in the Imperial Senate and Leader of the Rebel Alliance. _His Princess_. His wonderful, amazing Princess. _Who could have ever thought that a Princess and a guy like him..._ It made Han smile now.  
He had told her that he loved her, once. _Not enough,_ Han thought. _I will tell her again and again, as soon as she comes back from speaking with her_ **brother**, _Luke,_ he decided. It was still difficult for Han to believe that Leia and Luke were siblings, but he felt happy for them. After all, it was some good news for him, for he didn't have to worry about rivalry with a-wet-behind-the-ears-farmboy-turned-Jedi-Knight anymore. _As soon as she comes back, I'll show her how much I love her, how much she means for me. This little and quiet haven I found some time ago should be very useful…_ Han preferred stopping his way of thoughts right now before he became completely mad. Thinking about the night he was about to spend with Leia, making love to her, to his beautiful princess, well… he was _actually_ beginning to lose his mind!! 


	2. You are strong, Princess!

**Chapter**** 2:**** You're strong, Princess!**

Leia Organa came back to the camp. She had spent a large part of the night speaking with Luke, about Vader, Anakin… whatever his name was or had been. For her, he would always be a monster that had made her suffer. So he will never, never, _never_ be a father for her. 

Her father was Bail Organa, Viceroy of Alderaan, a peaceful planet the Empire had destroyed four years ago. _Four years_. No, Leia wouldn't cry. She wouldn't cry because she knew she was strong. Strong morally, and mentally. She was strong now, thanks to Han. Because she had eventually realized how right he was. 

Flashback 

If he hadn't been there, if he had left, she would be dead now. A day, before they went to Hoth, in Echo Base, while they still were in the Rebel Base located on Agantha III, Han had saved her life, once again. It had been two days after the Destruction Anniversary. She had been locked in her cabin. Nobody could enter. She had switched off her commlink. Her day had been off. Nobody could disturb her. Leia had worked all day as usual in the Command Center. She had done her work. But there still had been something bothering her: she had been seeing repeatedly this green laser flashing from the core of this hideous beast that was the Death Star and then hitting her home world. 

Leia Organa had spent all day fighting against herself, against this vision, against her tears. Several times she had whimpered, trying desperately not to yell. That had earned her curious glances from her colleagues and finally Rieekan, aware that something hadn't been right, had told the Princess to go to rest. She had obeyed, even if it had been still the afternoon. But as soon as she had closed her eyes, the nightmares, the vision, the green laser had started again, with such a force that she had woken up in a cold sweat, screaming, and weeping. 

Since Yavin, she had had secret therapeutic sessions with a rebel psychologist. After all, she was a Princess and a leader; that was why she wasn't allowed any weakness. When she had woken up this afternoon, the nightmare had been worse than any she had had before. Leia had got the feeling that she had been getting crazy: hence she had decided not to sleep anymore so that she wouldn't dream. 

Leia had felt tired. Tired of the role she had to play. She wasn't an actress. She had played long enough in the Senate. She had felt tired of keeping up appearances. She had been with the Rebel for nearly three years now, and all of them had been looking up to her, waiting for her to give them orders or a good word… As if she had been a sort a Messiah who had known all answers. _All of them_ had been oblivious to her inner battle, her efforts to keep a straight face… 

_Enough is enough. I want all this to stop _now_. I don't want to become crazy_, Leia had thought, while reaching for her blaster in the drawer of her bedside table. She had removed the safety catch and had held her blaster on her right temple. Leia had hesitated a few seconds during which she had seen her father's face like it had been after her election to the Senate: grinning and proud of her, his eyes had been shining. Leia had begun to cry softly and had whispered, "Forgive me, Father. I knew your hopes but I haven't been able to fulfil them. I'm sorry Father. I'm so sorry, I failed you… I failed you… Forgive me." Leia had closed her eyes and had been ready to fire. 

Then, all her world had changed. All had gone fast, a firm hand had grasped and had shacked her own and had made the blaster flow through the room, while the other one had pulled her in a firm but soft embrace. "Shhh, it's over, Sweetheart." _Han? How can he be here? He is supposed to be off planet_, she had thought then. Then, there had been the gentle caress of a hand through her unbound hair. When she had realized that it was Han, Leia had looked at him and had done her best to stop crying. She had made an effort to push him away, for she hadn't wanted his pity, she wouldn't have been able to bear it right now. Han had let her go for a moment and had stood up. Leia had believed that he would have left but all he had done was locking the door. _The Rebels don't have to see their leader breaking down_, had been his thought. Han had came back to the Princess, had taken her in an embrace again and had let her cry softly, without speaking but rocking her softly instead. 

The next morning, the both of them – still fully clothed - had woken up in her bed, entwined and curled up. When she had realized what she had just done, Leia had felt immediately frightened and angry. She hadn't been angry with Han but with herself for letting her guard down. _She had slept with Han Solo_, or more precisely, she had fallen asleep in his arms. She hadn't wanted to remember what had led to this situation. That was why she had only focused on her waking up in his arms, trying hopelessly not to think how _right_ it had felt. As far as Han had been concerned, he hadn't said anything about what had occurred the day before either. But Leia's strange behaviour and the way she had been looking at him had made him speak. 

"I won't tell anybody what happened yesterday, believe me," he had said. 

"Why not? You should be happy. You succeeded in thawing the _Ice Princess_, since you slept with me," the princess had answered coldly. "Wasn't it a part of your bet with Rogue Squadron, Captain??" 

"Rogue Squadron won't know anything about it. And I don't feel any pride…, Leia," Han had said softly. "None," Han had been stroking her left cheek and had had a sad look. "Besides, we were clothed. So, we didn't _exactly_ sleep together," he had tried to joke lamely. None of them had smiled or laughed. 

Taken aback because of what he had said about his lack of pride, Leia hadn't been able to do anything but had kept her temper, and had asked softly: "Why did you come yesterday, Han? Do you have a sixth sense or something like that?" 

"No. Don't you know? I'm a Jedi Knight who has sworn to protect damsels in distress and young farmboys…" This time, in spite of his seriousness, Leia hadn't been able to prevent herself from laughing a bit. Han had joined her, happy that he had been able to lighten the atmosphere. 

"Seriously, yesterday I came back from my mission with real food, and I wanted to ask you to join us, Luke, Chewie and I. Luke told me you were in your room, so I came. When I entered I saw you…" He had paused for a short while, before adding with a sad voice, "Oh Leia, why did you do that? Because of Alderaan?" 

Leia had hesitated a long time and then had nodded. 

"I can't continue living like this, reliving the destruction… and all those memories," Leia had begun to weep once more. "I can't live like this, Han, I just can't." 

"Shh, sweetheart, it's okay, it'll be okay now. You're strong, you will face up to it, Leia, you will face up to it," Han had said while comforting her. 

"No, I won't." 

"Yes, you will. And do you know why? Like I just told you, you're strong. Truth be told, I'm surprised you didn't break down before. It has been three years, Leia, since the destruction and if I were you, I would have already broken." 

"Broken?" Leia had asked, surprised. To her mind, Han couldn't have done something like that; he had seemed almost unbreakable, invulnerable. 

"Yes." 

"But now, would you still break?" 

"You broke once, sweetheart. Afterwards, there have been only nightmares, ghosts…" 

"I do have nightmares. Do you?" 

"Everybody has nightmares, Princess. I do sometimes, but they're sparse now." 

"Does it mean that someday, I won't have nightmares anymore? Does it mean that they'll vanish?" Leia had asked hopefully. 

"No, not vanish. But with time, it will lessen." 

"With time," Leia had repeated softly. "Thanks Han. Thanks a lot… for being there for me." 

"Anytime… Leia." He had almost declared 'my love', but he had held back the last words just in time and had pronounced her name instead. 

Han had been ready to leave when Leia had called him back. 

"How did you enter? I thought my door had been locked." 

"It was, Sweetheart. But remember, I can enter anywhere I want to," he had said with a wink and a lopsided grin. "Besides, I had a bad feeling". 

End Flashback 

Since that day, their relationship had developed and Han had always been there when she had needed him and vice versa. Even if their relationship had still been strange, they both had found strength in each other's presence, whenever they had had moments of weakness. And Han had kept his word. Nobody had ever known that Leia had broken down that day. 

And now, on Endor, remembering this event, Leia Organa was aware that during her short hesitation before pressing the trigger, she had unconsciously waited for Han to rescue her, one more time. And now she was going to join him, to spend the entire night with him, making love to him. Now she felt ready, after having denied her feelings for him during four years, during too long.  
Leia stopped abruptly when her previous thoughts - about her discussion with her brother - came back in her mind. Vader. She'll have to tell Han. 

"Han, there is something I have to tell you…," Leia repeated this sentence in as many ways as she could manage. Even as a Senator, she had never been so anxious before saying something in her whole life. 

_Han knows that Luke is my brother. But Vader? How will he react when I'll tell him the truth? Is he going to hate me? Or will he still love me?_ Leia suddenly feared the answer but resumed valiantly her walk. 

_I'll tell him tomorrow and only tomorrow. Not before, otherwise I might waste this night. Besides I __do deserve this night. We deserve it. Both of us. _


	3. A whitehaired ghost is always a bad sign

Thanks everyone for your kind words... here's the next chapter, enjoy!!

* * *

**Chapter**** 3:**** A white-haired ghost is always a bad sign…. **

When Leia woke up the next morning all she could feel was bliss. Bliss and happiness. She had just woken up in her lover's arms in this little haven he had 'discovered' the day before.

The sun was already high in the sky, but the large trees were preventing the sunshine from dazzling them. Han wasn't awake yet, so Leia took the opportunity to look at him, while letting the sunshine warm her. She remembered their night together with a precision that made her gasp. _The feeling of his hands all over her body in a way that they seemed to be everywhere at once. His kisses, first slow, light, soft and then hungry and passionate_. His patience and his kindness, the night before, had touched her to the core, more than she had ever thought possible. In some way, she had been so relieved by his behaviour, that now she almost wanted to cry. _How far he is from his mercenary façade and his bravado! That's why I love him so much._ While thinking, Leia was stroking gently and lovingly his dishevelled hair. _Gods, he really is gorgeous, _Leia conceded to herself. Lost in her thoughts, she wasn't aware that Han had woken up and was looking lovingly at her.  
"What are you thinking about?" asked Han in a husky tone. "Considering your dreamy look, maybe about a gorgeous and scoundrel nerf-herder? Hum, am I right?" added Han with a suggestive tone, sweeping his tongue around her ear, her weak point he had discovered. Leia was rapidly brought back to reality, her mind incoherent, while she melted in her lover's strong arms before making love to him once again.  
Not a minute, since she had woken up, had she thought about what she had to tell him.  
Something that would determine her future life. The whole truth about her family.

Throughout the galaxy, after the announcement of the Rebel victory, everybody cheered, happy that the tyrannical of Palpatine's era was eventually finished. This victory meant that a new era was born, the New Republic era. A fairer and a more respectful government.

The Rebellion had won and this word was spreading. Each world that had supported the Rebellion during the civil war, since the beginning or 'late' members, were sending a delegate to Endor, currently the 'capital' of the New Republic. But they weren't the only ones coming to Endor: rebel soldiers were coming back from worlds, where they weren't officially needed anymore, and rebel agents too, as well as spouses, partners, and families.

Among all these people, a woman, in her early twenties, tall with white hair and blue cold eyes, that seemed to be made of ice. Her name was Winter. She had been a rebel agent during the war, responsible for drawing plans for bases and the security, hangars, warehouses, hence her nickname, Targeter. She had also made attack plans, defensive plans… Pilot, architect, infiltrated agent in the imperial army had been some of her jobs during the war. And she had excelled at them. Now she was coming to Endor in order to do her other job as Princess Leia's lady-in-waiting. She hadn't seen the latter since the Princess had left Alderaan, according to her father's demand. Winter had then thought that Leia was dead, but nearly two years ago she had learnt that the Princess was alive, in the Rebel Base of Hoth. She could have joined her here then, but she had been needed elsewhere. That was why, as soon as that she had had an opportunity, she had come on Endor.

She landed at 15:00 Standard Hour on Endor. The Rebellion was still working to repatriate its troops and the delegates weren't there yet. Winter decided to look for Princess Leia immediately. She asked a few soldiers here and there but as anybody had seen her, she wandered through the camp, until she saw General Carlist Rieekan speaking with other officers near the camp fire. She went straight to him.

"Excuse me, Sir?"

Rieekan turned round, and being Alderaanian himself, recognized Winter at once. He dismissed his officers and began chatting with the white-haired woman. They talked of various things : the Rebellion, the victory, their respective assignments, their memories, their grieves for Alderaan…  
Eventually, Winter asked if he knew where Leia was.

"I've something really important to tell Her Highness. And I believe she will actually like this piece of news."

"Oh? It seems interesting. Is it something I should know or is it something between women? Like gossips for instance," Rieekan asked with a teasing smile.

"Oh no, you can know. I think even you would be pleased by this news. Alec Rialla is alive and as he knows Leia is alive too, he will come here to see her as soon as possible." Winter seemed almost proud of her when she had said it.

_Rialla?_ _Rialla is alive? Oh, no. How can it be possible? If it really is then it means only one thing,_troubles. _Just as Leia began to be happy, it's not fair. _

"General, Sir? What's the matter? Aren't you happy for Her Highness? "

Rieekan must have made a face for Winter to be worried.

"Happy? Yes… yes, of course, I'm really happy for Her Highness, Winter." He hoped that his voice hadn't sounded as false for Winter as it had for him.

If it had, she didn't say anything.

During this conversation, none seemed to have seen that a tall, dark-haired Corellian had heard it and then had frown after having heard Alec's name.

_Rialla, Alec Rialla_, Han thought. He nearly spat it aloud so much this name remembered him lots of black memories. From his past. A past he wanted to forget. His _imperial_ past.

Leia had been busy as soon as she had come back to the camp with Han. And now that she had finally ended, spoken with Winter and evoked memories, she was eager to go back to her lover. She had told Winter everything about him, except that she loved him and they were lovers. After all, nobody but a few knew and she wasn't ready to tell yet.

"General Solo left a few hours ago, Princess. If you're going to see him."

"What?" Leia stopped dead in her track, pale.

"He left. A little while ago."

"How do you know this?"

"I saw the _Millenium Falcon_ leaving when I went back to your hut looking for your datapad."

"He didn't tell me anything. He had not planned it. He didn't have to leave before tomorrow. I... I thought that he loved me," she whispered, as if for herself.

"Your Highness, what's the matter? For what I know, you can't be both in the same place during more than two, maybe five minutes without arguing. And now you seem sad."

"How do you know? How do you know _anything_ about it?"

"Well, I heard rumours… From pilots, mainly, it seemed that they even made bets about you two being lovers."  
That single thought made Winter laugh lightly and Leia felt insulted.

"Are you alright, Princess? You're pale."

"I haven't seen him today. And I must see him. I have something to tell him. Something very important."

"I saw him when I arrived here."

"Where? Maybe I can still find him. It's impossible he left."

"Well, I was chatting with Rieekan near the camp fire, and..."

"WINTER!!! I don't have time for it! I know you have an exact memory but I don't want details right now."

"I think I saw General Solo passing by while we were talking about Alec Rialla."

"You _think_ or you're sure??"

"I'm sure."

_Wait a minute. Alec??? Did she say Alec Rialla? _

"Alec???" Leia asked aloud. "Did you say Alec??"

"Yes, I saw him again last year on Ralltiir. He is busy now but he asked me to tell you that he was alive and coming."

_Alec is... __**alive**_. Leia became suddenly paler than she already was.

"Did...," Leia tried to find the right word. "Did Han hear you? I mean what you were both talking about? Does he know Alec name? Does he know _who_ he is?" Her last sentence was almost a whisper.

"Yes. I think he knows him. Especially by the face he made when we spoke about Alec. But I don't think he knows who M. Rialla is."

Leia didn't answer and Winter realized that she had to stop speaking about Alec and change the topic of their conversation in order to lighten the atmosphere.

"General Solo seems to care for you, you know?"

"Care?" Leia asked with a sneer. "He loves me and I love him too."

"Love? Leia, please, be reasonable! You can't love him or have him being your lover, it's impossible since you're..."

"SHUT UP WINTER! Just shut up. Who are you to tell me what I can do or what I can't? I _don't_ have to account for anything! Did you hear me? A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G!!!! I thought you were more a friend for me than an aide. And if what you are telling me is right, you've just made the love of my life leave. If it's the case, Winter, I'll never forgive you."

Leia left, furious, letting Winter, speechless, after this amazing outburst.

_Well, it seems that I'll have to avoid speaking about both M. Rialla and Solo in future._


End file.
